Lifeless Lunacy
by Klee Louise
Summary: Love is about caring, teaching, learning and tending to another’s needs, is it not? What if that love wasn’t returned? Would you hurt the one you loved? Or just kill them? ..::One-Shot::..


**Love is about caring, teaching, learning and tending to another's needs, is it not? What if that love wasn't returned? Would you hurt the one you loved? Or just kill them? **

Pairing: HPSS

Rating: R

Warning: There will be mild SLASH! Violence is a major throughout this One-Shot. I will repeat that, there will be violence taken out upon human flesh. It isn't really graphic but to some of you with weak stomachs it might be too much. If any of this squicks you out, please do not continue.

Disclaimer: These characters do not, I repeat, do not belong to me. JKR is the lone soldier who owns these beautiful people. The plot is mine. Oh how I love playing with these precious souls...

_Thank you Tori for being the beautiful person and Beta that you are KISSLES AND HUGGLES_

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**Lifeless Lunacy**

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I watched as Severus' head went under again. His beautiful hair was flowing around him as he struggled to come up again. He was getting weak, I realised. Sighing, I dragged him up for another gulp of air. He really didn't deserve this air I was freely letting him breathe…and contaminate. Actually he didn't deserve much. Of course he didn't believe that. He saw himself as better than me. Above me. As far as I was concerned, that wasn't very nice. I was the nicest thing that had ever happened to this man, and this was how I was treated? No, I thought as he tried to pull away, he would pay for pushing me away.

"Now Severus, do you really want to make me angry?"

I chuckled as he looked me in the eye and spat in my face. As I conjured up a tissue and wiped his saliva from my cheek, I watched him calmly. When he seemed to relax, I drew my fist back and threw it at his face. The satisfying _crack_ and moan of pain that escaped his throat made me smile smugly.

"That wasn't a smart thing to do Severus. You haven't been very smart of late, have you?"

As he shook his head I pulled him to my chest and stroked his cheek lovingly.

"I gave you so much Severus. My soul was yours to do with what you wished. I should have known it would mean nothing to you. I loved you and treated you so well. Everything I've done was for you. _All for you_."

Preparing for the violent movement from him as he struggled against my chest, I pushed his head back under the water. I blew him a kiss as the water rushed into his mouth. Oh how wonderful, I thought gleefully. I watched delightedly as his eyes began to close and he went limp in my arms.

Pulling him from the water, I skipped up to Hogwarts with him floating behind me, whistling as I went.

**xXx**

When I walked into the Great Hall, I smiled as all movement and sound stopped. They must be wondering what Severus had gotten himself into. The stupid man was always making trouble for us. Never listening to what I had to say, and therefore making me mad. One day he'd realize I was right. I was always right.

I walked towards the frowning headmaster.

"Headmaster, Severus and I just had a little disagreement. I'll be taking him down to _our_ rooms. Please make sure no disturbances occur. There will be severe consequences if I am not pleased. Am I understood?"

Grinning as Albus nodded sadly, I whistled as my bleeding and unconscious ex-lover followed willingly behind me.

**xXx**

Reaching the portrait that led to our rooms, I whispered our password. When the doors didn't open, I became quite upset. Whirling around towards the floating man beside me, I snarled _enervate_ and glared as he blinked rapidly and winced as his eyes rested on me.

"Severus, did you change our password?"

He nodded.

"You will tell me the new password now, or I will be forced to cut out your tongue."

He watched me wide eyed as my wand turned into a small dagger.

"_I hate you_."

"Yes, you do so love to tell me that. But I believe I wanted…"

I froze as our doors opened. Looking at Severus while he tried to evade my gaze, I smirked.

"Very inventive, Severus."

He scowled at me while I laughed. My dear Severus still had spirit. I smiled as I flicked my wand in his direction. He went flying in through the door and hit the wall opposite the archway. As he slid down to a crumpled heap on the floor, I thought merrily, _that shall change after tonight_.

**xXx**

I dragged the dagger through the tip of his nipple. Too bad he was still unconscious I thought. It would be interesting to see his reaction to all this blood. I smiled serenely as I licked his bleeding chest. Such pretty designs. I sucked on the blade and decided to awaken him. When his eyes flicked open, they were glazed with delayed pain. He started to sob. Rolling my eyes I leaned down and pushed my tongue past his quivering lips. I moaned as I fell into bliss. All this bleeding was really turning me on.

"Wh…Why…are you do…doing thi…doing this?"

"Severus, my love. You know that answer. You never loved me did you? If you had accepted me for me, everything would have been grand. But no, you couldn't do that could you? You used me. You and that meddling old fool tried to bring him back. He won't come back you know. He's too weak. That's why I'm here."

I frowned as he began to sob harder.

"I never loved you. You took him from me. I love _him_ you monster."

Well now, that wouldn't do.

"You _will_ love me Severus." I hissed, "I will bleed you dry just to hear those three words leave your pretty mouth. They _will_ be meant for me."

He cried out in pain as I began to slice the skin between each of his toes. After each cut I sucked the incision and moaned as each drop of blood left his body and entered mine. Once I'd finished with his feet I began on his hands. It was difficult too reach his hands with these manacles in the way. I freed his left hand, and sucked each finger, one at a time, into my mouth. He would accept my care. I hadn't killed him yet, had I? Of course not. I loved this man, and I would tend to his every need. Right now he needed to learn.

I pulled his hand away from my mouth and started tenderly slicing the skin between his fingers.

"You know Severus. You could be enjoying this. I will heal your chest. Your skin shall be flawless yet again. But you really do need to see what it is I do. I see you. I see me. And then I see this wall. That wall is what I intend to bring down. I want to see you without this wall blocking my precious view."

I started as he laughed.

"You think I will allow you to bring down my only protection against you. You can use my body. You can mutilate my flesh. But my mind will remain his."

The blazing fury that blinded me couldn't be stopped. My hand was burning. Flames erupted from my fingertips as I led my hand towards his thighs. I trailed the flames along his inner thigh as his screams of pain rained down upon my ears. I placed my other hand under his belly button and grinned as the fire trickled along the hair that led to his placid cock. I licked my lips as I watched the flames flare along his hips. I wasn't cruel. I wouldn't allow the burning to damage his manhood.

I shuddered as his crying smothered me. I could never get enough of this man.

Shouting in shock as the lamp from his beside table, hurtled through the air straight at my head, I jumped out of the way and in doing so fell of the bed. Sitting up quickly, I watched victoriously as Severus tried to undo the other manacle.

"Severus, they are tied to my magical signature. I don't think you'll be escaping anytime soon."

"_Imperio._"

I felt my mind go blank.

_He was stronger than you. You can't fight the Imperious. Unlock these chains._

I watched in horror as I summoned the small dagger still sitting on the bed. When it hit my palm it was once again my wand. I couldn't control my body. How had Severus obtained his wand? How was he controlling me? He was weak. I was strong. This wasn't supposed to be happening. I started to quiver when I unlocked his feet and right hand. He grinned down at me quite evilly as he calmly stepped down from the bed. He walked over to his potions cabinet and pulled out one of his healing vials. After he had drank the potion he went and pulled a robe around his nude body. When he faced me, I was truly afraid.

_You took him from me. He was mine. I could have helped him. Instead I had to deal with you. You fucked me. You cut me. I was your toy, and I allowed it. In my mind I was helping him. But he's not coming back is he? You hurt me and him, and for that I will kill you. Change your wand back to your dagger. Cut across your wrists, not down; that way I can watch you bleed slower. It will be great entertainment watching you die._

I gasped as I drew the dagger along my wrists. Slowly my blood began to drop onto the floor as I kneeled and waited for my next command.

* * *

"_Please…please forgi__ve me. But I won't be home again. Maybe someday you'll look up and barely conscious you'll say to no one, isn't something missing_?" 

Severus looked up from his crouching position outside his bedroom door. The other man was still lying on the floor beyond this door. But the singing wasn't his, nor was it the other man's. He pushed open the door violently and ran to the bleeding man's side. He was singing. Severus hadn't ordered him to sing.

"…_Am I that unimportant? Am I so insignificant? Isn't something missing? Isn't someone missing me_?"1

Severus began to sob as the dying man's green eyes slowly opened.

"I'm back…" A gurgling sound was made from the man's throat, "…Severus, Merlin I love you."

"Is he…is he gone?"

Severus watched as those glorious lips which had snarled such cruel spells to make his body vibrate with pain, smiled slightly.

"He's gone."

"Oh thank Merlin. I thought I'd lost you forever. He said it so adamantly. I thought all was lost," Severus swallowed around his words, "Love you, Harry."

Severus watched as the still young man nodded tiredly, and looked at him intently.

"I'm dying Severus."

Severus started shaking his head and mumbling to himself.

"I can heal you Harry. I made him cut across your wrists. That way if you could come back I'd have a chance to bring you back. You'll be up and…"

"No Severus," Harry shook his head weakly, "I can't handle living anymore. I want to be with everyone. I love you Severus but I can't live like this. I'm dying and I want to keep dying. It's a great feeling you know. Dying I mean. It feels like being born again…only backwards2."

Severus had tears sliding one after another down both cheeks. He had crouched by his cabinet and was slowly rocking back and forth. Harry watched him and smiled.

"Come here Severus."

Severus looked up despairingly. He crawled over to Harry. There was so much blood already. His chest was heaving with heartfelt sobs.

"He's gone Harry. He can't come back. You're back. Everything will be alright. We can leave Hogwarts and start anew. We can even leave Eng..."

Harry pressed two fingers against Severus' mouth. He tugged at Severus' hair and pressed his mouth to Severus' willing lips. Pulling back he looked into Severus' eyes.

"Come with me."

Severus blinked and swallowed thickly.

"What?" he croaked.

"I'm dying. Take one of your poisons. We'll die together. We'll be together forever. What's left for you here Severus? We can live life as we've always wanted with those who needed us just as much as we needed them. We still need each other. Let's die together?"

Harry watched sadly as Severus gazed unseeingly at everything around him. He smiled slightly and turned to Harry.

"What does it feel like again? Dying that is."

Harry spoke softly, "Like being born again, only backwards."

"I wouldn't mind being born again…"

Harry chuckled and lightly traced the bruise that spread from Severus' nose to his right cheek.

"Did I do that?"

Severus shook his head and whispered, "No, he did."

"Same thing really."

"No it's not. You're Harry. He was Potter. The part of you that could handle everything you couldn't. He was the part of you that you couldn't handle. You're sane and he was insane. There are quite a bit of differences between you two."

Severus kissed Harry's cheek warmly and stood up, heading for his potions. He pulled out one of his many poisons, the fastest to take action against his body. He walked back to Harry and sat down behind him. He gently placed Harry's head onto his lap, and leaned up against the wall behind their bed. While playing with Harry's hair, he began to hum the song that Harry had been singing before.

"I can feel it Severus. I'm being born again."

Harry watched as a tear fell from Severus' cheek. Severus pulled out the stopper from his vial and tipped it down his throat. His hand tightened around Harry's as Harry began to go limp in his arms. Severus smiled as he realised Harry was right. Harry mouthed 'I love you' while Severus kept his eyes on Harry's and repeated what Harry had tried to say.

_It does feel like I'm being born again._

The last thing he saw before sweet eternity was Albus' smiling face looking down upon him and Harry.

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No one sane would enter through this door 

A river of blood flowed along the glistening floor

Life wasn't a given when born into the light

Many a man would rather die at night

So much was spilt during these deformed wars

How did one reach the Earth's burning core?

A lone man stood in shadow, watching the frost

He asks, "Why does life have such a high cost?"

He cried as he fell to his knees

Arms wrapped around his chest as he watched the twisting trees

He couldn't breathe as another life was lost

Gone and came another, just one more host

The arms loosened and another cried at the act of truancy

Can a life become dead when there's Lifeless Lunacy?

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Hello again. This is the result of me being in a very unpredictable and extremely pissed off/shitty mood. First off: 

1 This song is Missing by Evanescence.

2 I got this from Casper. Casper says it when Kat asks what is it like to die.

Nehoo, to all those who are reading Erroneous Shadow, no need to worry I'm still writing it just a few things have been holding me back. My parents for one (All those still living with theirs, I'm assuming you understand. All those who aren't, I'm sure you remember.), and organizing my Uni decision and what-not is another. The fourth chapter will be up soon and I'm planning on posting the beta'd version of chapter three tomorrow night.

This One-Shot was the product of my now non-existent love life. I finished it today but I'm guessing if I had kept at it last night the ending wouldn't have been as sweet. But nehoo I love how it turned out and I'm hoping you can all at least tolerate it. Ta Ta!

..:Klee:..

P.S. The poem at the end is mine. I wrote it to go with the story. It's just a quick pen to paper so I'm hoping it does make sense. If it doesn't please tell me and I'll see what I can do to explain it, or if worse comes to worse, change it.


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